A kleptomaniac woman had been caught shoplifting in a supermarket and had to appear in court, taking along her long-suffering husband for marital support.

有个女人因为盗窃癖，在超市行窃被抓。她被告上法庭，她那不堪其扰的丈夫也不得不出庭辩护。

The prosecution proved that the theft had taken place so the judge told her that, considering her record, he was forced to impose a jail term.

检方指控的偷窃行为，证据确凿。法官对被告说道，考虑到她之前的作案记录，这回不得不判监禁了。

"This time you stole a can of tomatoes. There were six tomatoes in the can. Do you agree?"

“这一次，你所偷一罐西红柿，里面共有六个。你是否承认？”

The woman agreed.

被告承认了。

"Then I sentence you to six nights in jail."

“那么，我判你六天的监禁。”

The husband jumped to his feet, addressing the judge, "Your honor, may I approachthe bench?"

这时，被告的丈夫一跃而起，大声向法官陈述道：“大人，我请求法庭会议。”

"Well," said his honor, "this is somewhat unusual but I will make an exception in this case. You may approach the bench."

“呃？”法官愣了一下，“辩方现在求情实在少见，因为这个判决已经很轻了。不过这次可以破例。准许法庭会议，请双方到法官席来。”

The husband wasted no time getting there and, leaning forward, he said in a low voice, "She also stole a can of peas."

丈夫快步走向法官，他伸出脖子低声向法官说道：“她还偷了一罐豆子呐！”

清凉解读

我们应该学一点法律知识，懂一些法律英语，这样以后在英语国家打官司不会太紧张，至少离婚什么的还是能搞定的。首先，这个被告是怎么回事呢？

Kleptomania is the inability to refrain from the urge to steal items and is done for reasons other than personal use or financial gain.

盗窃癖是指当事人无法抑制偷东西的欲望，并且偷窃行为是出于个人使用和获利之外的原因。

被告的行为是商店偷窃(shoplifting)，属于盗窃行为(theft)。美国法律把犯罪行为(criminal cases)分为三个档次：违规(infractions)、轻罪(misdemeanors)和重罪(felony)，盗窃属于其中的轻罪。超速驾驶之类属于infractions, 而谋杀(murder)则属于felony。

Criminal cases are usually filed by the district attorney (also called the "DA"), which represents the state, against one or more defendants.

犯罪案件通常是由一名地方检察官，代表国家对一个或多个被告发起指控。

不过呢，在法庭上被定罪不代表就要坐牢。在法庭上，有罪(guilty)无罪(non-guilty)是陪审团(jury)决定，判决(sentence)轻重是法官(judge)拿捏。控辩双方与法官可以通过法庭会议达成谅解，获得减刑或者缓刑等。

法庭会议(approach the bench)

v. an attorney's movement from the counsel table to the front of the bench (the large desk at which the judge sits) in order to speak to the judge off the record and/or out of earshot of the jury.

动词。律师从律师席移动至法官席前方同法官进行直接交流，该对话不受陪审团听闻，也不入法庭记录。

Since the bench area is the sacred territory of the judge the attorney must ask permission as "may I approach the bench," or simply, "may I approach."

法官席是法官的神圣领地，律师在进入前必须先明确申请。

If the judge consents, then opposing counsel must be allowed to come forward and participate in the conversation.

若得到法官同意，则对立方律师必须获准上前参与对话。

The purpose can range from explaining the order of witnesses, a technical problem or the need to take a recess to go to the restroom.

法庭会议的目的可以是解释目击顺序，解决技术问题或休庭去上厕所等等。

还有，出庭的时候要严肃认真！称呼法官为“大人”(Your Honor)，有理也不能猖狂，否则会被判藐视法庭(contempt of court)……大家有空可以去试试哦～